Every year at this time nature make its spring comeback. The trees behind the house fill in, while the bushes in front plump up like third graders. Flowers of all types open up and show their colors. Meantime the wildlife does the same: we see deer, squirrels and chipmunks, not to mention the occasional fox. Flying critters of all types flit around, some splashing in our birdbath, some buzzing around the flowers, both building nests in nooks and crannies high and low.
And one damn bird always tries to break into the house.
Both our living room and dining rooms have large bay windows with uninterrupted plates of glass with no screens. They offer an unobstructed view of the front gardens, lawn and street. But from the outside they appear to offer unencumbered access to the rest of the house. Any human would know by looking that it's not an actual opening, that there is a clear obstruction in the way.
But not all the locals are human. And so without fail this time of year, from the front of the house we hear a thump, a pecking, a fluttering, a pause, then the sequence starts again. And if you sneak to the edge of those rooms and look out, you see a feathered intruder trying to gain entry through brute force.
It's not even like it's the same bird. Last few years it has been a robin, and since their life span is two to six years, it's possible it was the same one over multiple seasons. But this year's trespasser is a gray catbird, and he or she seems dead set on barging in to join us.
Simply scaring it away is a waste of time. We jump out, yelling incomprehensible gibberish and bang on the window. It has some effect, as it immediately retreats into the bushes. Bang a few more times, and it flies off into the trees. We usually stand there waiting for it to return, and when it doesn't, figure maybe it got the message. But we are no sooner upstairs or down then we hear that telltale "THUMP" and it starts all over again. Including our yelling. Us: 0, Bird: 1.
Research says that best explanation is "territorial aggression." Birds see their reflection in the window and perceive it as another bird invading their territory. Their pecking and repeated attempts to "get in" are an aggressive display to drive away this rival. And so perhaps our friend could be forgiven for merely policing his turf. Except its ours, not his.
Search for others who have fended off similar attempted home invasions, and a number of solutions are offered. You can make the window less reflective, adding decals or milky solutions like soap streaks. You can also add visual deterrents, like hanging CD's or other shiny objects, as well as more aggressive looking obstacles. We have tried it all, including propping up a Halloween scarecrow and a lifesize cutout of a terrier (don't ask why we have that). Other than making our neighbors wonder what is happening in our house, and probably giving the bird a good laugh, nothing seems to work.
And so this year we decided to try an exterior solution. I took an old mesh tarp and nailed it up over the window in the dining room. Then I stood back to wait. Sure enough, after a while, he made a return appearance. He perched in the bushes in front of the mesh, tilting his head this way and that, as if trying to figure out what was going on. He flew up and grabbed onto it, but didn't peck. He tried a few different spots, all with the same effect. After a while he flew off, heading up into the trees. I headed to the kitchen to get a celebratory snack. Us: 1, Bird: 1.
And then I heard the usual pecking in the living room.
I guess he figured if one entrance is no good I'll work on the other. But I had a demonstrated solution. So I got a piece of burlap, and did the same with that window. And the pecking stopped. All good, except that if you are driving past you might think we were attempting to wrap our house as Christo did to the Reichstag. But it seemed to work, and demonstrated that being at the top of the food chain, having opposable thumbs, and a larger brain than a bird is worth something. Us: 2, Bird: 1.
And then we heard pecking at my office window. Us: 2, Bird: 2. The contest continues.
-END-
Marc Wollin of Bedford likes wildlife, as long as it remembers who is the boss. His column appears weekly via email and online on Substack and Blogspot as well as Facebook, LinkedIn and X.
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