Social Eating

While you may have come to hate the words, over the past two years there are countless things that have "pivoted to virtual." And while they may not have been perfect replacements, the internet equivalents were at least functional. You couldn't go the theater, but Netflix was more than adequate. School and work became the equivalent of food courts with videoconferencing. Concerts were scaled down to intimate "at home" performances. Even visiting with family and friends was possible: from happy hour to weddings, all available roads led online, so we grabbed the Zoomer-thingie in one hand and a glass in the other.

There was one area, however, that had no online equivalent and it involved food in all its forms. True, you could order takeout via countless apps, and even attend virtual cooking classes and learn the best wine pairings. But the most important aspect of any food interaction, the actual eating and tasting, was a nonstarter. For all of our technological derring-do and tales of cross-platform connectivity, sending spareribs via the web has yet to be perfected. (Actually, it has never been done, but maybe one of these days. Are you listening Facebook?)

So as we dip our toes back into the real world (or just as likely run at full gallop into the pool while screaming madly and do a belly flop), one of the things we most want to do is put something, anything into our mouths with other people by our sides. And while that means restaurants and ice cream stands and bar-be-ques, it also means festivals. Those social gatherings were in mothballs for the past two years, and are just bursting to get back on our dance cards. While there are any number of general get-togethers and food truck rodeos, there are also a number of highly specialized gatherings which appeal to very particular tastes. As the calendar rolls out, here are just some of the options for spending a few hours on a weekend stuffing your face.

Just around the corner is the party in Ellsworth WI. As the "Cheese Curd Capital of Wisconsin" it celebrates that status with a festival at the end of June. At the Cheese Curd Central Booths, you can get them three ways. They have the classic, where they are deep fried and ready for dipping in your favorite sauce. If you have a sweet tooth you could try the cinnamon sugar dessert curds, described as "If a cheese curd and a mini donut had a love-child, this would be it." And then there's the fair's mystery flavor, as yet to be released. Past favorites have included hickory, jalapeno bacon and Buffalo.

Or you could head to Barnesville, MN. Any other time of year you might be tempted to travel the 20 minutes to nearby Rothsay to see the 9000-pound statue of a Prairie Chicken. But if you go at the end of August, Barnesville is ground zero for the Potato Days Festival. Between the picking, peeling and mashed potato eating contests, you can immerse yourself in all things spud. And you can try the local lefse, a sort of potato flatbread that pays tribute to the region's Norwegian heritage.

If you have time to head to the Midwest a little earlier, the place to be in early August is Crystal Falls MI. It's there that for the 30th year they will be feting a giant mushroom that's been growing since, well, no one really knows. Covering over 37 subterranean acres, this Armillaria gallic can't been seen, but that doesn't stop the locals from celebrating it. And what do you call a festival for a very large mushroom? Why, the Humongous Fungus Fest, of course.

That's hardly the end of the list. At the end of July in Woodbridge, VA there's the Potomac Mills Mac and Cheese Festival. In Somerville, MA in September it's the "Fluff at First Sight: Back on Track" festival, celebrating the marshmallow spread. And the last Saturday in September in Marlinton, WV is the annual Autumn Harvest Festival and Roadkill Cook-off. Not to worry: the dishes prepared don't actually use real roadkill, but rather the kinds of animals that often end up that way. Past offerings have included stewed black bear mixed with chili and beans, squirrel gravy on biscuits, and "Drunken Deer in the Headlights."

Maybe I'll just throw a burger on the grill and call it a day.

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Marc Wollin of Bedford loves to eat. His column appears regularly in The Record-Review, The Scarsdale Inquirer and online at http://www.glancingaskance.blogspot.com/, as well as via Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter.